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December 02, 2010



thank you so much for sharing this story in such an insightful and beautiful way. my daughter also suffers from this invisible fog that invades her life. i think that the more people talk about it and let those of us trying to fight through the fog to find you again get a better understanding.


Oh yes. I do know of what you speak. Both watching friends from the outside... and as a participant feeling it inside myself. Yes, indeed I do know.
I'm so very, very glad that you are finding the way out again. Many hugs of understanding sent your way.


You describe so perfectly what depression is like. Anyone should be able to understand how it affects you and all you love. You have been missed.


Ah! This is perfect! All my significant others (partners, family, friends) struggle with depression and they would all appreciate your essay on the topic. It is so hard to be a supportive friend while someone you love is going through this - thank you for the reminder of the time needed and the appreciation of friends who stick around.

Do you have any supplement suggestions for friends who battle depression?

Thank you for sharing your thoughts. So glad to hear you are finding your balance. xo


Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.


And it's a load for those who care for us, too. I know my partner loves me and understands that I'm sick, but it is hard for him, too, to not be hurt by the disappearing inside my own head for weeks at a time.

The one thing I've grasped as I've gotten older and that I didn't understand as a teenager is that (as the campaign says) it will get better. It takes time. It takes an almost inhuman amount of patience. But each time it does, in fact, get better.

Who knew we could be such warriors?


For me it was like I was in a glass bubble, everything going on outside it and me alone inside it and I couldn't get out. Then something would happen inside me and I was better. I always felt I was at the mercy of this thing, had no control. Fortunately, I found the right medication and am fine, but I hope I never go back there again. Thank you for opening this topic. And I give you my best wishes.


dear,dear Daughter. You've done it again--touched many people with
your wise words. I know this has been a really hard year for you and I am so very proud of you. This blog will help those who read it. You have helped me so many times. Much love, Mom


Yes, that's it. The withdrawal into the fog the seeps in with the merest of tendrils but soon becomes so thick you can't see through it, and the gradual lifting, small beams of light slowly turning into sunshine. Sometimes it feels like a shroud. You didn't mention the exhaustion, though, from the sheer effort it takes to paste on that smile, carry on that conversation, and pretend that everything is normal. Keep strong -- one day at a time.


An eloquent description. But I ache for you having to live it over and over again.

Perpetual Lurker

I've been there, more times than I care to recall. And I knew you suffered this disorder, could read it between your words and in your silences. I've been reading here for years, through my own depressions, and every time I've come to your site I've seen that kinship. It wasn't until today that I realized you haven't actually posted on the subject before.

I'm glad to hear that your fog is lifting again.

(I wish I could sign my name, but I'm twice shy on this topic.)


Oh my dear. You've said it perfectly. Having experienced a few bouts of major depression in the past, I know what it's like to live in fear (and denial!) that it likely will hit again. It sneaks in so slowly, doesn't it? The bastard... ;-)


my youngest has asperger's, and takes antidepressants. it took us YEARS to find the right medication/dose. the worst part is when he outgrows his dosage, and we have to experiment again. now, believe it or not, we're working to reduce some of his medications, which may help relieve the need for as much of his antidepressant. he's 16, and growing at an amazing pace, both physically, and emotionally, but we're finding peace. thank you for your post, it helped remind me of what he goes through.


I call it slipping down the rabbits hole. Sometimes I can tell when it's happening and try to stop it, other times it just overcomes me.


*big hug* I'm glad you're peeking back out of the darkness! I'm all too familiar with depression, having the treatment resistant variety myself. :(


So glad you're feeling some better. I hope 2011 sees your health and energy returning in spades!


I haven't been reading blogs, but just out of laziness, not depression. How fitting, though, that I would click on yours as one of the first to catch up on.

So sorry about your depression. I wish you the best in the New Year. I have one or two brief waves of feeling low each year, probably hormone- and weather-related more than anything, enough that one good friend always knows that I'm not myself, but it goes away quickly. Another friend of mine is not so lucky but after years of struggling has given in to antidepressants and is loving what they do for her.

I didn't know about your physical troubles, either. For me, exercise keeps me up, so not being able to get that rush would be depressing in itself. Hang in there. Thanks for sharing.

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